I couldn't do anything that day besides cry.  Cry and feel sorry for myself.  Oblivious to anything that happened around me I decided to skip school that day and sulk in my own misery.  Cried for hours.  Stopped.  Then started to cry again for the lack of options.

My heart felt like it shattered.  Or at least wounded in the midst of a battle called love.  My mom came home from work and I strayed out of my dark bedroom into the living room where she heard my sobbing.  She took a look at me and asked what was wrong.  I started to sob even more and within choking gasps I told her I got dumped.

My mother laughed.  She chuckled and said to me; "why would anyone go out with you?  Look at you, your short, your stupid, your ugly and got nothing going on.  Why would anyone love you?"  I was taken aback by such cold and shocking comments that I immediately stopped crying.  Like a pale of ice water was doused over my head to wake me up.  She told me that no one will love me the way I am now, and she was right.  I assessed  myself, there and then in my head why a girl wouldn't like me, and that's when reality sunk in for a hormonally and emotionally dysfunctional teenager.

I was a nobody.

My mom's words still stick in my heart like a prick, like a reminder that grounds me and my often egotistic view of myself.  They ground me now and I work hard.  I work hard to better myself in any way I can physically, mentally and emotionally.  Just so I can get rid of this prick and prove to my harshest and loving critic that I am worthy of preceding her genes that she so bestowed upon me.

So don't worry ma, your voice is heard.  I'm gonna become better, I'm gonna become stronger and I won't let you down.  No matter what, until one day...  You can say that your proud of me mommy.

I love you, thank you for being here for me.