December 1, 2009

• "Namaste"

  Today I had another lesson smacked into me.  My wrong is acknowledged and I accept my flaws.  No point arguing, no point raging, no point in instigating something I have created... without my presence and... ultimately because of my presence...   No story.  That's that.  I don't feed the evil that ruins lives.  I can't.

  In the past I would have lost full control of myself and let the day rot away as my mind dug itself deeper unto the Darkness within...  I would have shut up, not smiled, think of nothing else but wanting to go home...  but I didn't.  I took a break, pulled out my notebook and started to write...  and so I did;

  ~*~

  November 30th 2009

  "I write to think and think to write.  Questions arise and my thoughts scatter wild.  A secret caucus meeting with the inhabitants of my mind... Me, Myself and I...  Endless brooding, intentions, ill thoughts...  So many Ego's...  Clashing, fighting...  My reality falls in the grip of the Condemned, no longer awake.  An independent monster, unleashed to destroy what I cherish so.

  I stepped away from everyone and declared my isolation to which I only dig myself deeper into this eternal abyss.

  Void.  I wander these corridors taking meaningless left's and right's.  My eyes are clouded and my heart is shut.

  Little hope did I have of pulling myself out of my own grave... but within the Darkness I heard your voice...  A single word echoed in my head then resonated throughout my body...  'Namaste'.

  'The Divinity within me perceives and adores the Divinity within you.'

  I opened my eyes and let the light shine through...  and what I saw, made me smile so much that in that instance, nothing else mattered...  I was here, with you, nowhere else..."

  Thank you, for bringing me back in to the light...

  • 4:05 am
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